10 Lifestyle Tips for Stressful Seasons
One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned over the past few years is that when you’re presented with a challenging season in life, a dark night of the soul, or you’re recovering from a trauma, your lifestyle often needs to change along with everything else.
For many years, I was able to maintain a consistent routine and schedule. I had my sleep routine down, I had my exercise routine worked out, and even though life definitely had its stressors, I was in a place where I could respond to them by just doubling down on my routine without any problem.
But then life threw me some curveballs and everything changed.
Some of those changes were amazing (like meeting and marrying the man of my dreams), but other changes were really hard, like leaving behind a career I’d worked hard for, moving, and experiencing a few really difficult and scary situations.
The last few years have not been easy ones. They’ve tested me and tried me and re-shaped me into a new person, and with that has had to come a change in the way I live my day-to-day life.
The following 10 tips are the things that helped me most during this time. If you are going through a challenging season, a dark night of the soul, or are recovering from trauma, my hope is that these tips bring some peace, ease, and healing into your life…
1) Hone in on Your Priorities & Let Go of What’s Not Essential
When you’re going through a stressful phase in life, or perhaps you’re in survival mode, it’s vital to differentiate between what is truly essential to get done and what isn’t. If there’s ever a season to not give into over-achieving or perfectionism, it’s this one.
Ask yourself, “Does this absolutely need to get done right now?” and “Does this need to be done by me?” If the answers are no (even if you’re anxious about it), give yourself permission to let it go or ask for help in getting it done.
2) Make Healthy Eating Easy
It is so easy to throw all healthy eating habits out the window when you’re in a stressful season of your life…and I get it.
There are times when we just have to do our best and get by, and maybe that means Chick-Fil-A for dinner because it’s the best you can do, but we don’t do ourselves any favors in the long-run when we use a hard season as an excuse to completely phone in our health. I recommend trying as best you can to make healthy eating as easy as possible during hard seasons.
In our house this looks like stocking up on hard-boiled eggs, avocado or guacamole cups, almond crackers, veggie trays, rotisserie chicken, healthy protein powders, high protein coconut yogurts, and other easy-to-grab snacks. We’re also big fans of having a handful of easy meal ideas that we love and just keeping them on rotation. This means things like turkey burgers, salmon/veggies/rice, Greek chicken bowls, chicken teriyaki with broccoli, etc.
There were several times over the last few years where I also lost my appetite completely. In this case, it’s so important to still make sure you’re getting the nutrients you need, so I try to get in carbs, proteins, and fat altogether when I can (things like smoothies with protein powder and healthy fats, peanut butter on sourdough toast with some yogurt on the side, etc.)
When we’re going through hard seasons, our bodies naturally tend to be more inflamed due to stress. No need to add to that with your diet if you can help it.
3) Switch to Low-Impact Workouts
I will admit that this one took me a long time to really embrace.
For about half a dozen years or so, I was a huge fan of higher-intensity workouts and weight lifting and I loved it. Sure, I had my days where I had a little less motivation to workout, but for the most part I had a great relationship with exercise and I genuinely enjoyed my time at the gym.
And then about two years ago, my body revolted. In the blink of an eye, I lost any and all motivation and desire to exercise the way I used to. My mind wanted to go back to my gym-rat ways, but my body was just not having it.
Shortly thereafter, I went through a series of extremely stressful (and some traumatic) events that left my nervous system raw and ragged. Having used exercise for stress relief for so many years, I tried to go back to my old workouts, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t seem to push through in the way I used to, I didn’t enjoy it, and instead of it being a time to relax, it was only creating more stress on my system.
Instead of weight lifting, running, and HIIT workouts, my body was begging me to slow down. I was craving barre, pilates, yoga, walking, hiking, but admittedly I told myself that low-impact workouts would be taking the easy way out.
It took me longer than I care to admit to realize that with all the things that had changed in my life, my fitness routine needed to change with it.
And when I did finally allow myself to give into that, my body responded.
So if you’re going through a hard season, a trauma, or an intense time in your life, here is your permission slip to not let your workout be another intense thing.
During high-stress periods of life, you might also find that you don’t have the physical or mental energy to expend lifting weights, running, or doing other kinds of high-impact or high-intensity workouts and that is okay.
Low impact doesn’t necessarily mean easy and it also doesn’t mean not effective, it’s just a gentler approach to an already over-taxed nervous system.
4) Ground Yourself in Nature as Often as Possible
The more we have prioritized a high-stress, busy, on-the-go city life over spending time in nature, the worse off we’ve become as humans. Physically, emotionally, and spiritually we are deprived of so many of the benefits of spending time outdoors.
We’ve become so disconnected from this way of life that people are still quick to either mock and dismiss the importance of being in nature or think “Oh that’s such a great idea to spend more time in nature” and then they continue scrolling on their phones.
Spending time in nature has numerous health benefits including:
Decreased cortisol
Decreased blood pressure
Better sleep
Decreased stress, anxiety, and depression
Decreased anger
Increased positive emotions, such as feelings of calm or joy
Improvements in focus
Decreased inflammation
Improves your immunity
Spending time in nature is also such a powerful way to connect to or repair your relationship with yourself. Nature is the ultimate healer and we severely underestimate the power of being outdoors.
I also firmly believe that nature is one of the best ways to deepen your spiritual connection, whatever that may be for you. It’s hard to spend time in that kind of beauty and not believe in something greater than ourselves.
5) Let Yourself Receive Help
One of the most damaging effects of the “Strong Independent Woman Movement” is the belief that as a woman you have to do it all.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard from the incredibly intelligent and successful women I work with that they either a) feel like they can’t ask for help or b) they’ll ask but feel guilty about receiving the help because they “should” be able to do it themselves.
This is a tough thing for a lot of the women I work with, because so many of us have been raised with specific beliefs about what it means to be a strong woman. And while that strength and independence has been adaptive in many areas of our lives, when sh*t hits the fan we can feel stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Now, I am definitely not telling you to go into helpless, damsel-in-distress, Wounded Maiden mode, but I am asking you to lay down your sword and accept some help from the people around you during this hard season of your life.
In the same way that it feels good for you to show up for a loved one in need, give your circle the chance to do the same for you. And if you don’t have a tribe around you who can support you, reach out to people and invest in help where you can.
6) Anchor Yourself with a Sacred Morning Routine
I know that sometimes the idea of a morning routine can feel like one.more.thing that has to get done, but setting aside even 5 minutes to deliberately calm your nervous system and connect with yourself on a spiritual level will have a massive effect, especially during a hard time in your life.
While some seasons of life might allow for (or require) a more luxurious or in-depth morning routine, you can make any amount of time sacred and beneficial.
In some phases of my life, all I had time or energy for was making myself a cup of coffee and drinking it intentionally while sitting on my balcony. These days I have the space and time to have a longer routine, but it hasn’t always been that way and I know it won’t stay that way consistently.
You might choose to spend a few minutes breathing, journaling, reading a chapter of an inspirational book (I love Simple Abundance and Romancing the Ordinary, both by Sarah ban Breathnack), meditating, doing an embodiment practice, lighting a candle, pulling some cards, or saying a prayer.
Remember that the time won’t naturally find itself; this is something that you have to make the choice to prioritize.
7) Make Sleep a Priority
Speaking of priorities, sleep must be one of them if you’re going through a hard season or healing from something.
Sleep is where our bodies, minds, and souls do their healing and if you’re not getting enough good quality sleep, everything else in life will be harder.
Now, I know that depending on your circumstance, it genuinely might not be a possibility to get enough good quality sleep, like if you have a newborn for example. But no matter where you are in life, do your best to ask for help, delegate and prioritize where possible so you can focus on getting as much sleep as you can.
It’s also important to have a good nightly routine that helps you calm down and stay asleep.
My favorite tools for winding down are the Serenity line from doTERRA (I will take a capsule or two if I need some help sleeping), a warm epsom salt bath, lavender or Serenity oil diffused in our room, a heat pack for my belly and a chilled eye pillow for my forehead. This might seem very high maintenance, but they are easy things I’ve relied on for years that help optimize my sleep routine.
8) Be Mindful of Sensory Overload
While the nervous system is getting more and more attention, one thing that isn’t talked about as much is sensory overload.
If you’re a highly sensitive person (like most of my readers and clients), then it’s likely that during challenging seasons of your life you’re going to be more easily overwhelmed by things that other people don’t even register.
Things like being around loud noises, spending your day in harsh lighting, people asking you questions all day, spending time in other people’s energy, etc.
This means that it’s especially important for you to detox from that sensory overload by spending time in nature, wearing comfortable clothes, using soft lighting/dimmers/candles when you can, diffusing calming scents, using a weighted blanket, and engaging in some sensory deprivation (like spending five or ten minutes in a completely dark room with no sound).
Sometimes for sensitive people it’s not necessarily the stressor itself that is overwhelming, but the sensory effect it has on your body. Being mindful of sensory overload can help keep you and your nervous system regulated.
9) Supplement for More Support
One of the things I wish I had done differently over the past few years is start supplementing sooner.
Last summer, my doctor recommended that I really increase my supplement intake to support my body’s stress and inflammation response. I kind of dismissed it at first, thinking ‘How helpful could this really be?’, but I was so desperate to feel better that I was willing to try anything.
What I noticed was huge differences in my health within just a month or so of supplementing my body correctly and I’ve never looked back.
A few of my favorites are:
Opti Mag Neuro (the only magnesium that crosses the blood-brain barrier)
Relax Max Magnesium in Cherry (I mix this with Opti Mag for my “magnesium nightcap)
doTERRA Turmeric (a special formulated dual chamber capsule which is great for inflammation)
doTERRA MetaPWR Advantage Collagen (I will admit that I thought this was all marketing hype, until I tried it and noticed results in my energy, mood, and brain fog within the first week. Hands down one of the best supplements I’ve ever taken)
Quicksilver Gaba & L-Theanine (I call this liquid calm, because a few squirts of this and your entire body will relax)
My Equilibria CBD Softgels and Daily Drops (I first started using Equilibria after having a horrific case of the original COVID virus back in March of 2020. After 6 weeks of serious illness and an unrelenting fever every day for an entire month, my anxiety was through the roof. This CBD helped me avoid having to go back on medication for anxiety and I will be forever grateful for that. I’ve used it off and on when I’ve needed it over the past few years and love it.) If you would like to try it for yourself and receive $20 off, please help yourself to my referral code REFALEX.SMITH.BMC12 (I do earn a small credit when you use this link. If you choose to use it, thank you for your support of my work 🤍)
I am also a huge fan of Dr. Charlie Fagenholz and his In the Trenches Membership. While I’ve only been a member for the past few months, I’ve benefitted from so much of the holistic health information he shares, in particular his thoughts on supplements and herbs. I would highly recommend this resource if you’re looking for more natural solutions to up-level or heal your body.
10) Pockets of Peace
Many years ago, in the midst of a really difficult situation when it was hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel, I decided to implement a practice I call “pockets of peace.”
Pockets of peace are small little moments of joy, pleasure, or comfort that you can look forward to throughout the day.
For me this started as completing my 5 Minute Journal in the morning and evening, delighting in a cup of tea from Starbucks in the afternoon (and taking it in with all my senses), and an epsom salt bath at the end of the day.
Everything else in my life felt challenging and stressful during that time, but at least I had these small little moments to look forward to.
Nearly 8 years later when I look back at that time in my life, I remember those pockets of peace just as much as the situation itself, because it represented a commitment to still find some joy in an otherwise dark time.
No matter what you’re going through in this season of your life, you owe it to yourself to find your own pocket of peace, whatever that may be for you.
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Alright my friends, I hope you found this helpful.
If you are looking for more support during this season of your life, I’d invite you to check out the following resources:
My free Myth of Persephone & Women’s Mental Health Masterclass (great for viewing hard seasons in a new way)
My free Does the Goddess Belong in Therapy Masterclass (for those who haven’t found the healing they needed in traditional therapy)
Archetypal Activation Sessions (harness strengths you never realized you had)
1:1 Coaching (personalized spiritual coaching and support)